A Deeper Problem

The other day, someone in my writer's workshop made the comment that he liked to write his short stories in present tense because they gave the story a sense of urgency the story lacked in past tense.

(For those who do know, this means he wrote the story like "He runs to the car door and yanks it open. 'Get out," he shouts at the driver" instead of the more traditional "He ran to the car door and yanked it open. "Get out," he shouted at the driver.")

Except, his story still lacked tension (which he obviously sensed) and changing to present tense didn't fix that. What he really needed to do was fix the story by adding tension, not try to artificially increase tension by telling the story in present tense.

I've heard a lot of writers say that they write in first person (i.e. "I went to the store") rather than third person (i.e. "She went to the store") because it allows the reader to get inside the character's head in a way that third person doesn't allow. Except, that's not true. Both styles can allow the reader deeply into the character's viewpoint.

For example:

Mandy was going to be late for the party, and Shelly would never forgive her. She looked down the dark, creepy alley knowing that it was the only route that would get her there in time. She hesitantly stepped into the alley. Something rattled further in. She jumped backward and smacked into something tall and firm.

versus

I was going to be late for the party, and Shelly would never forgive me. I looked down the dark, creepy alley knowing that it was the only route that would get me there in time. I hesitantly stepped into the alley. Something rattled further in. I jumped backward and smacked into something tall and firm.


If you just like writing in present tense or first person, that's fine. However, if you write that way in hopes of fixing a problem with your manuscript, let me warn you that the problem probably still exists. Look deeper and fix the problem instead of just trying to hide it.