A Historical Quote

Thomas Paine wrote these words on December 23, 1776 in a pamphlet called The American Crisis which was given to the American troops when they were on the verge of losing the Revolutionary War.

What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; 'tis dearness only that gives every thing its value....it would be strange indeed if so celestial an article as freedom should not be highly rated...

What I'm Reading

Title: The Sailing-Ship: Six Thousand Years of History
Author: Romola and R.C. Anderson
Got it: library

I got this book for research in an attempt to confirm something I'd heard elsewhere about ships with only square sails being quite limited as to when they can sail. Well, this book didn't really cover that though it did hint in a sentence or two that such was true.

What this book does cover are the details of how the ancient Mediterranean and European boats where put together (hull, masts, sails, rudders, materials used, etc.) based on pictures, archaeological discoveries, and eye-witness accounts. The book was written in 1963 and so doesn't contain recent discoveries.

Done with the First Draft

I just finished the first draft of my second novel, Rumors of War.

The writing took longer than I expect for several reasons. The first was that the story just kept growing on me. The word count currently stands at 94,784 words. That, in turn, is partly because I spent more time filling in the descriptions and doing the research needed for the details now rather than in the second or third draft. Thus, I'm hoping my revisions won't take as long as for my first novel and that I'll need to do fewer drafts. I think my first readers would like that, too, since I think they're getting impatient. ;)

In any case, I'm taking a week off for the holidays. Merry Christmas!

What I'm Reading

Title: Japanese Inn
Author: Oliver Statlar
Got it: library used-book sale

I just finished reading this book for research. The book is a history of Japan from about 1596 to 1957, but it's done from the point of view of the people who ran a real inn along the Tokaido Road. The story is somewhat fictionalized at times and gives the reader a vivid feel for the times, the people, and the place. It's much more than the dry dates, names, and events most books give. The book is a good way for anyone interested in the Japanese to learn about their history in an entertaining way.

Some Short Stories I Like

Some of Tor's authors have written short stories that are posted on the Tor.com website for free. If you'd like to know what types of stories I like to read, some of my favorite short stories on the site are:

Shade by Steven Gould

Firstborn by Brandon Sanderson

What to Describe

Writing advise abounds on how to appropriately describe a character, object, or setting, so how do I go about it?

1) Describe first what the character would notice first. For example, gender, skin color, hair color, and physical build comes before the faint scar over the eye or the eye color (which the character might never be close enough or have any reason to notice). Also, a foreigner might first notice skin color while a native might never consciously notice it.

A long physical description can slow down the story, however, and a police-report description is usually not needed. So, how do I choose what description to include?

2) Base the description length on how important the person, object, or setting is.

3) Describe what is unique.

For example, if I'm describing a spear, I really don't have to say much. Most readers already know what a spear is and can imagine it based purely on the word "spear." If the spear is important, though, I might describe something unique about it: a scrap of blue cloth tied just below the iron head.

Don't just give information but use the description to tell the reader something about the character. Which sentence gives a more unique and interesting description of this minor character?

The sight of a short, plump woman wearing a dress and a hat distracted Randy from what his friend was saying.

or

The sight of a short woman wearing a tall hat topped with an ostrich plume distracted Randy from what his friend was saying.

I'm guessing you agree the second description is more interesting.

4) Be specific.

Instead of saying "the woman handed him a drink" be specific and say, "The waitress handed him a tall glass of water." Using specific nouns instead of general ones allows the reader create a vivid image in his head and reveals more about the characters.

So my advice is to keep focused on what your description is supposed to accomplish rather than coming up with long police-report descriptions.

A Deeper Problem

The other day, someone in my writer's workshop made the comment that he liked to write his short stories in present tense because they gave the story a sense of urgency the story lacked in past tense.

(For those who do know, this means he wrote the story like "He runs to the car door and yanks it open. 'Get out," he shouts at the driver" instead of the more traditional "He ran to the car door and yanked it open. "Get out," he shouted at the driver.")

Except, his story still lacked tension (which he obviously sensed) and changing to present tense didn't fix that. What he really needed to do was fix the story by adding tension, not try to artificially increase tension by telling the story in present tense.

I've heard a lot of writers say that they write in first person (i.e. "I went to the store") rather than third person (i.e. "She went to the store") because it allows the reader to get inside the character's head in a way that third person doesn't allow. Except, that's not true. Both styles can allow the reader deeply into the character's viewpoint.

For example:

Mandy was going to be late for the party, and Shelly would never forgive her. She looked down the dark, creepy alley knowing that it was the only route that would get her there in time. She hesitantly stepped into the alley. Something rattled further in. She jumped backward and smacked into something tall and firm.

versus

I was going to be late for the party, and Shelly would never forgive me. I looked down the dark, creepy alley knowing that it was the only route that would get me there in time. I hesitantly stepped into the alley. Something rattled further in. I jumped backward and smacked into something tall and firm.


If you just like writing in present tense or first person, that's fine. However, if you write that way in hopes of fixing a problem with your manuscript, let me warn you that the problem probably still exists. Look deeper and fix the problem instead of just trying to hide it.

What I'm Watching

Title: China: A Century of Revolution (2000)
Got it: Netflix

If you like documentaries and are even remotely interested in China, I'd strongly recommend this DVD. I watched it for research and was fascinated by the interviews and archival footage. The production seemed like a balanced view of China's recent history. It certainly shows how different the Chinese culture is from our own.


Though I don't recommend it as strongly, for another view into how differently other cultures think, I'd suggest:

Title: Japan's Longest Day (1967)
Got it: Netflix

It's a historical drama produced by a Japanese film company and depicts the Japanese view of the events occurring in the 24 hours leading up to Japan's surrender in WWII. The film is in Japanese (it has English subtitles) and is a bit gory in spots, but, wow, it's an eye-opener.

Motivation

I am reading a book where the author doesn't take full advantage of showing what's going on in the main character's head and so some of his actions seem abrupt and out-of-character. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:

Sarah stomped up to Rebekah, who was smiling and holding another book clutched against her chest. Sarah scowled and threw the current book Rebekah had loaned her to the ground. "This book was horrible. I swear, I'll never read another book by that author. In fact, you couldn't pay me enough to read another one!"

Rebekah said hesitantly, "Oh, I'm sorry. I brought the next book in the series with me, but I guess you don't want it."

Sarah felt a surge of anger. "Of course I want it. The book's right here, so of course I'll read it."

You're left wondering why Sarah suddenly changed her mind and why she's reacting so strongly. Or, if you're like me, you're feeling a little wary of Sarah and wondering if she's insane. ;)

I expect the author knows a perfectly sensible reason why her main character acted the way he did but forgot to let the readers into his head so we also know. Here's an example of how adding motivation can help make an about-face scene like this make sense:

Sarah stomped up to Rebekah, who was smiling and holding another book clutched against her chest. Sarah scowled. She'd rather liked the book Rebekah had just loaned her, but she didn't like how her friend was getting into the habit of forcing books on her and she wasn't going to allow it to happen again.

She threw her book to the ground. "This book was horrible. I swear, I'll never read another book by that author. In fact, you couldn't pay me enough to read another one!"

Rebekah said hesitantly, "Oh, I'm sorry. I brought the next book in the series with me, but I guess you don't want it."

Sarah felt a surge of anger at Rebekah for picking this moment to finally bring a book she did want to read. "Of course I want it. The book's right here, so of course I'll read it."

Sarah's still not a very nice character, but at least we understand why she's acting the way she is. So, authors, be careful not to throw an unexpected emotional reaction at the reader. Make sure to get into the character's head and explain why they felt that way so the emotional reaction makes sense.

Fulfilling Your Promises

A reader buys a book with certain expectations on what it's about. They base these expectations on the book's cover, the title, the back cover description of the book, what they've heard about the book, and by what they've read on your first few pages. If the author fails to fulfill those expectations, then the readers will be angry with him or her and probably won't buy other books by the same author.

I just read a mystery book. The back cover says the book is about the hero finding out why his wife was killed. The title is the name of the road where his wife was killed. The first few chapters describe the crime scene and launches the search for the wife's killer. The cover shows a hand which is green with moss (or something) and is barely sticking up out of some water. Since the crime happens near a river, I expected another dead body to be found in the river.

Were these expectations fulfilled? Nope. At the end of the book (which ends on a cliff-hanger), the man who ordered the wife's murderer is still free and a threat (on the last page, he's shooting a gun at and about to kill the hero). We still don't know why the hero's wife was killed. No green-covered hand is found in water (as the cover suggests). And a lot more unsolved side-mysteries have been brought up and not resolved.

So what was the book about? Well, the hero and his friends solve a mystery which they think is the reason behind the wife's killing, but it isn't. While a mystery is solved, it ultimately had nothing to do with the wife's murder or any of the current conflicts. The book didn't fulfill the promise.

If the title had been the name of the property were the solved mystery was located and the cover and back copy copy focused on that mystery, then the promise would have been kept...to a certain degree. I'd still say that something in the first few pages needed to hint that, while a murder starts the book, this isn't the murder that's going to be solved.

So be careful to know what expectations your title and first pages raise so that you can fulfill them and keep your readers happy.